A Wino’s Farewell to Wine

I love wine.

I love the taste, the smell, the way it makes me feel. I love wineries, wine bars and wine menus at restaurants. I love it all. I even like wine in boxes.

But I’m giving it up. For now.

Last night I made the (very difficult) decision to kick alcohol to the curb until I get pregnant.

A few factors spurred this decision. First, there are some studies linking alcohol to decreased fertility. I didn’t pay any mind to these studies when I first read about them. There are other studies out there saying alcohol while trying to conceive is No Big Deal. Indeed, many of my dearest friends were 100% tipsy when they got pregnant. Alcohol does not seem to mess with the average gal’s fertility much, so why should I worry about it?

Because when it comes down to it, I’m not the average gal trying to get pregnant. Even though I’ve had a couple periods since I’ve started upping my fat intake, they’re still not super regular and I’m ovulating way late in my cycle.

Second, I’ve been doing (and blogging about) so many things to make myself healthier these last few months, that ditching the sauce seems like the next logical step in the process. One thing has been naturally leading to the next as I’ve been slowly, but surely, building a healthier me.

And finally, I’m willing to go to great lengths to get pregnant, if necessary. I’d try Clomid, I’d inject myself with drugs and, yes, I would do IVF, the final frontier. Hopefully I won’t have to do those things, but that’s beside the point. If I’m willing to do all of those things, then why shouldn’t I be willing to try giving up alcohol first? It’s certainly more natural and less invasive than the things mentioned above. Plus, those medications, etc., are so expensive that I’d feel like I was wasting my time and money if I wasn’t as healthy as possible before I even thought about trying them.

Bottom line: it just feels like the right thing to do right now. I’ve written a lot recently about listening to the needs of my body and paying attention to my inner voice. And right now my inner voice is pretty much screaming at me about this.

But it is not going to be easy. Drinking is so much a part of my relationships and activities that I think I’m going to feel lost without it. After an emotional day, I could always uncork a bottle. When I was bored? Another bottle. Oh and let’s not forget celebrations. That’s at least two bottles.

It’s going to be totally weird for me to navigate all of that without my trusty elixir.

Why am I telling you all this? Because I need your support. Even if you just post a comment on this blog or say something supportive to me in passing, it would really help a lot.

I’m not going to give up alcohol forever. Oh hell no. But for now, I must make the following goodbyes. Because it’s not just my beloved wine that’s got to go, it’s everything:

Goodbye, beer sampler...
Goodbye, Guinness...
Goodbye, car bombs. Godspeed.

46 thoughts on “A Wino’s Farewell to Wine

  1. If I’m hanging out with you the night I plan to drink my one glass of wine per week I’ve limited myself to, I’ll ditch it just for you 🙂 And just think of all the money you will be saving…

  2. I gave up booze during the magic 2 weeks after ovulation every month I was trying to get pregnant. Social situations and celebrations can be tough, but you’ll learn to love the seltzer and juice or spiced apple cider mocktails. And waking up without a hangover? Priceless.

  3. Well, this is a hugely wise decision. One day at a time,
    I’d say. Have you read anything by Wayne Dyer such as Your Sacred Self? It’s an oldie but goodie. Love you. A

  4. I think this is a GOOD decision and admire your courage in moving forward with getting yourself healthy and ready for pregnancy. I promise that it will get easier to go without, and then you’ll be ready for a long 9 months once you are pregnant!

  5. Tanya! I love you and am so proud of you. Let’s do booze-free dinner or movie marathon soon. This is where your tendency towards control will come in verrrry handy. You always have my support. xo.

  6. Tanya, I am proud of you for taking this step for your health. It is indeed really difficult, but when you do get pregnant, you won’t be able to drink anyway, so it’s good to start now! I gave up drinking before I started trying to have a baby, because I was going off my psych meds and wanted to be as healthy as possible going in to my pregnancy. Once I got through the early stages of constant nursing, I added a glass of wine at night, after nearly 2 years of not drinking. Funnily enough, Joel gave up drinking at that time, for his mental/physical health! Giving up drinking is so fascinating because you realize you have to be so PRESENT. With all the feelings, boredoms, and experiences of life. It’s hard, but it’s ultimately really good. And for you, it won’t be forever! Hang in there, and write about it! We’ll support you. Joel likes to make a little “mocktail” for himself each night with lemon juice, ginger and ice. Maybe you can find your own little non-alcoholic elixir to have that ritual of a nice drink?

  7. You have my full support! You have been skirting this issue for a while anyway, and there is no better time than now to take the plunge. I found it’s a lot like WW; you need to realize the ultimate good, then just take your day one hour at a time. Socializing can be very difficult, but if you think of it in terms of “I’m not drinking tonight” it makes it easier. I think you’ve already done that when you were having the stomach problems. Like you said, it isn’t forever. And, as another friend said, you can’t drink during your pregnancy, so it’s a tryout. I am there for you.

  8. I look back upon the time when I was in treatment and I could not drink anything. It really was not difficult at all. As others have said this is a practice run for when you are pregnant. I think that this is a good decision for you to make and will ultimately result in a pregnancy. You have nothing to loose with this decision, only some unnecessary calories! I am so proud of you and support this decision 100%. Love Mom

  9. Awesome. Superb. Right there with you. I mean it. I won’t drink until after you’re pregnant.
    Consequently, my suggestion would be that you stay on the wagon once you’re pregnant, but that’s a tale for another time.
    So, let’s do this, or not do this, rather.

  10. I see what everyone is saying about giving up alcohol as being a “tryout” for pregnancy, but I see it a little differently. I didn’t _want_ wine when I was pregnant, but I wanted it when I was nursing or had a wee one and couldn’t exactly pack him up to go to the bar at night. When I saw your hilarious montage of social drinking moments, I thought about how fun it looked, and then when I thought about why I thought that, it was because of the pre-kids lifestyle, not so much of the booze itself. Right now, I’m not pregnant and don’t want to be, so theoretically I could drink every night if I wanted to. But I can’t, because the baby gets me up in the middle of the night and Liam gets me up at the crack of dawn, and the alcohol wouldn’t be worth it because without sleeping it would make me unable to parent the next day. I wish that I even knew where to obtain a beer sampler that looks that delicious, but I don’t because there’s no drive-through where I could get that, to go, and not have to unload car seats and take my kids into a bar or liquor store.:) So what I’m rambling around here is that you are actually becoming a parent already by taking this step, because you are experiencing not having what you want WHEN you want it. Substitute wine for a full night of sleep, or sex, or an hour of quiet to write…the bottom line is that you are experimenting with it being not “all about you” and that’s the whole deal of being a parent. So, mad mad props to you, and I wish you didn’t have to do it this early simply because I want you to have every last minute of pre-kid fun you can. xoxo.

    1. Molls, thanks for your hilarious and thoughtful comment. Maybe when our kids are grown we can start a drive-through beer sampler business. I bet it would catch on like WILDFIRE!

  11. What everyone else is saying makes a lot of sense. its the not drinking you will miss but the social aspects that come with it. and guess what – you don’t need to drink to have those! We can have our fun and just not drink! apple picking, jamming, yoga, lots to do! Keep doing what your doing! Your happy and thats all that matters!

  12. The social part will be challenging, but think about all the other benefits! 1.) You’ll definitely have more money! Save it up and buy yourself something amazing. 2.) No hangovers = more energy. Even if you are just having one or two drinks, it still effects you in the morning. You’re gonna feel GREAT. 3.) It’s actually kind of fun to be the only sober person in the room. You are surrounded by people who love you and you’re quitting with a goal in mind. I’m sure you’ll do great!! xoxoxo

  13. so yes, the part of the social universe that involves drinking will be affected, but think of that universe now expanding to include all of the wholesome things you can now do with energy or even couldn’t do at all b/c you were too hungover to do in the past..like mutt struts, and yard sales, and charity walks and flea markets, and odunde festivals..ha. you name it. and you can coerce the unclean alcies like myself: ) to come along with you! i say it’s a win win and only takes a little extra time to focus the camera lens you’re pushing ever so slightly:) now let’s get those early morn plans going, love you T!

  14. Kudos to Zac, what a wonderful thing for a friend to do. Also hugs and kisses to Tim for giving up the sauce too!

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